An open letter to a concerned mother
This is in reply to the article in The Hindu, an open letter to a daughter http://www.thehindu.com/opinion/open-page/an-open-letter-to-a-daughter/article5180069.ece.
Dear concerned mother,
This letter is not for my mother or mother-in-law but for those mothers who keep expecting “good news” from their newly-wed daughters or daughters-in-law. This is for those who feel that young married women are running too quickly in the race of life and do not stop or pause to have a child.
Firstly, not everybody gets married only to procreate. Most educated, cultured women are happy with the way their lives are running. With a population in our country soaring high, it doesn’t matter if some women choose to live otherwise.
About the science part, may be women are exploring newer options and are not healthy or physically ready to carry the burden of motherhood. For some, there could be medical reasons due to the food habits that are cultivated.
Yes, most women are not ready for marriage because they want to settle fiscally and enjoy their married life before getting committed and although in the outside world men and women are on par with each other tradition practices otherwise. For all these reasons, young women fret over getting married.
As long as the girl or woman is a spinster, the older women coax them to get married without understanding their views and then once they get married, they await the proverbial good news. Life is not a cycle of creation and procreation.
Some women find solace in companionship and marriage and wait to get comfortable. It is not a mechanical process that you get married and then quickly procreate.
Shouldn’t a child be born out of love and affection?
Most couples work to lead a happy life as well as meet the expenses. Today, even the school fees for kindergarten is 5 to 6 times more than the 90s or 00s.
Shouldn’t a child be given a good life? Yes, we do agree we need to chalk out and balance. Many of us are. Do read the article: Mumpreneurs in The Hindu to learn more about balancing passion and children.
But yes, the bottom line is the letter is very biased and also, women are taking their time to fit into the paradox.
Hope you understand.
Regards,
A newly wed
Note: This is not to demean the author or pin-point, but this is a common cry of many newly-wed young girls who have been tormented to have a baby even before they enjoy the bliss of togetherness. Such articles and letters only increase the agony.
In modern times, a couple has to manage everything from house, finance to EMIs etc. It is not fair to encourage such a thought process.